“One more time and I will mute you.” I said that to a video participant after I’d already asked him four times to please be quiet and let the other person talk. This wasn’t a power grab or show of force. The video session was to prep a business case presentation. I’d already worked with this guy the week before and he had completed this 10 minute exercise I take participants through.
He: She can use my powerpoint, we worked on the same project
Me: No. The board wants you to present what you did.
He: Well she can tweak mine, we did the same thing
Me: No, You are two different people, you did not do the same thing.
He: Well, She can use mine as an example
Me: No, I appreciate your generosity and willingness to share, please let me do this 10 minutes with her like I did with you.
He: OK, I can show mine side by side…
Me (cutting him off) : No.
The three of us laughed. Then I was able to get started. OK, what’s was the business problem? Y’all now he couldn’t help himself; he spoke again, That’s when I said “one more time and I will mute you.” In the end, two different experiences of the same project emerged.
|Business Problem.||Our services were not selling.||We don’t work if our services don’t sell,. We the team, were afraid of being laid off.|
|Challenges||The sales team was not selling our services.||The sellers were no longer getting a commission for selling our services.|
|Solution||I developed proof points for the value of our services and a business case for the clients as a sales tool.||I developed a new product and proposed it be included with the sale of the software. The executive team accepted this proposal.|
|Result||Our services are selling.||Our team is fully engaged and deployed.|
Particularly of interest for this was how the male and female had a different experience. I’m careful not to make this a he said, she said, or versions of the story. Those things imply a right versus wrong. The multiple times I told the guy to be quiet, wasn’t to show a right or wrong, but, to show how you can form an “assumptive experience” and become impervious to anything else. I highlighted male and female because this shows how diversity in thought leads to success. This 10 minute exercise showed how each focused on a particular high value area that made this project successful.
This week, consider the impact of the assumptive experience.
Men…Work place…Mansplaining…all too familiar? Stick with Hers on this one 😉
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What one hears amd what another
Communicates should not be our problem and yet it is! Sigh
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