We have 12,000 to 85,000 thoughts a day; the average being 50,000 thoughts. That’s a lot of thoughts. For most people (probably you included) 85% to 95% of those thoughts are negative. Are you listening to yourself? Time to rebalance your thoughts. Rather than the obvious -notice your thoughts take a different focused approach. This week,…
Ugh. The Humanity. A young man laying in the street on New Montgomery and Market huddled in a green sleeping bag. Cars going around him when necessary. People looking at him with concern but moving on. I stopped and asked him several times to move and explaining why. He didn’t feel good and maybe he…
It’s award season, golden globes, sag, Oscars, blah, blah, blah. So, what about you create your own awards. Reflect back over the last year, what are the things you feel a sense of accomplishment. Of these things, what are the three things you could be nominated for an award? Who would be in your field of…
You know the debate, the one about nature versus nurture¹, which is more powerful? It’s usually a conversation about the environment a child grows up in. What about now, as adults, what’s the impact of nature versus nurture and what is nurture for grown folks? Here’s the deal, researchers have pretty much agreed, the nature…
Years back, I held a team meeting that fell on the Lunar New Year; my PowerPoint started with Happy New Year; Welcome the Year of the Ox. A member of the team pulled me aside during the break, “This makes me uncomfortable, I don’t believe in this.” Rut roo, what do I do? Do I explain…
“Life is too short,” is an over used, misguided cliché of fill in the blank babble. At least from an analytical view. The average lifespan for American men is about 76 years and for American women it’s around 81 years. Not that short. You don’t know when you will die, you don’t know the day,…
I was in class, using a notepad with inspiring, tear off quotes. I become totally fascinated with the concept of caterpillars. When they go into the cocoon, do they think it is a sarcophagus, like “yo man, this is it, I’m out.” Or is the caterpillar thinking spa treatment, “it’s my time to get a new…
“I call BS on that; either you’re happy or you’re not. There is no “more happy;” if that is your New Year’s resolution, check yourself. You’re not happy.” That was my neighbor’s response to someone who said my New Year’s resolution is “to be more happy.” Nuances aside, I saw his point. For example, if there…
We’re the same people, doing the same thing. Last year was my best Christmas ever, so I was afraid to make the family holiday this year. I admitted it to my brother back in August when he was setting up this year. He said, “we’re the same people, doing the same thing.” A simple statement with…
I changed a flat tire Friday and posted a photo on Instagram. There were a couple of comments along the theme of more women should be able to change a tire, a woman can change a tire, wow, etc. I chuckled because it’s not just women who can’t change tire. I know men who have…
Enough is enough. Irregardless is not a word. It’s not, stop using it. It’s got memes, punchlines and the eye rolling. Regardless of how much it is misused, it’s not made its way into the dictionary or the statutes of acceptability. What about Grandfathered? That seemingly innocuous term to indicate a provision in which an…
How often do you say some form of, thanks for the context, now answer the question? My guess is not often enough. Yet, you’ve had an experience where you ask a question, you get a response yet the problem is, the response has relatively nothing to do with the question and more often than not,…
This is the story, screenwriter Gregory Allen Howard spent 26 years bringing the Harriet Tubman story to the big screen. Howard said. “I was told how one studio head said in a meeting, ‘This script is fantastic. Let’s get Julia Roberts to play Harriet Tubman.’” Howard said when someone suggested Roberts could not play the role, the…
More first responders die by suicide than in the line of duty each year. In 2018, more police died by suicide than by on the job fatalities. Firefighters have a higher suicide rate than police. It’s alarming, especially considering suicide among among first responders is typically under reported by as much as 60%. “You will…
It was the usual manager career questions with an unusual answer. “This job should not exist in 3 years. I do everything I can do to make my job go away. I love my job, but we have serious problems if this role looks the same three years from now.” I think, what would have…
Three years ago, a third of the homeless population were over 50. Today it is half. Half. Half of the homeless are over 50. An alarming 44% became homeless after 50. Fifty is typically celebrated as that milestone birthday, it’s over the hill. Now? That hill is a slippery slope into an uncertain future. There was…
Quick, sketch the logos for Toyota, Audi and Tesla. Finished? Did you struggle? Sure, you recognize them when you see them, but can you draw them? There is a difference between recognition/familiarity and knowledge.Recognizing the ingredients in a cake and familiarity with making a cake does not necessarily make you a baker. This week consider…
There is a Zombie Apocalypse. You can become a zombie, you can fight the zombies or you can flee. What do you do? Pause for a moment and consider. What’s your response? Now, think about your actions over the last two weeks. When do you acquiesce, when do you fight and when do you flee?…
“Are you sure?” You know you’re in trouble when your blood pressure aps questions your entry of 167/90¹. I’m a little over 5’6”, I weigh 118 pounds, I walk over 20 miles a week and spend about 6 hours in that same week doing yoga. Why so high? I’ve been black most of my life.…
Because she is the most decorated gymnast in World Championship history. Because she made history by being the first woman to land a triple double. Because she sought therapy after suffering abuse from Dr Larry Nasser. Because she spoke with eloquence of USA gymnastic “….they couldn’t do one damn job. You had one job. You literally…
When you film something, do you go back at look at it multiple times? Or do you post to social media as a one and done? Why do you film an event? Is it to prove you were there, is it something so amazing you have to share, is it in case something goes horribly…
“Stop, stop, stop. You’ve bee talking for almost 2 minutes and I have no idea of what you are talking about. This is a 911 call. not a police report. What is the business problem?” That’s me doing my job, coaching technical people to speak so normal people can understand. I am blunt. I have a…
I love a good leopard or cheetah print; it’s not for everybody, but it works for me. I feel the same about Rosemary Lemonade; it’s got that extra zing. However, If you’re not a fan of lemonade or detest rosemary, you’re probably making a squinch face even thinking about it. Nothing wrong with the lemonade…
I am bouncing around like a lunatic. I mean, even for me, it’s a lot; I got full moon fever. My mind is racing, I can’t settle on a blog topic – the diminishing impact of I never heard of that, rosemary lemonade and the anomaly or the quest for design thinking: please Apple,forget the…
I am directionally challenged. I google and mapquest to figure out what my destination looks like ad how to get there. Once, I noticed my chatty phone had gone unusually silent, I discovered in that 15 minutes of silence, I’d lost my signal. I now print backup directions in addition to leaving extra time and…
It’s Labor day, so let’s talk about jobs. Switchboard operator, hot metal typesetter from the early 80s are jobs that do not exist today. Video rental stores are no longer viable businesses. Today we have instagram influencers who make between $30,000 – $60,000 a year, Social media strategist who makes upwards of $80,000 a year.…
How many times did you go through a yellow light last week? Did the light turn red before you cleared the intersection? Stop it. Yellow means slow down and stop if possible, the light is going to turn red. Seriously, stop it. Walking to dinner a few weeks ago, a friend of mine snatched me…
All of the excuses over the years I’ve used to explain creases, puffiness, saggy skin or folds of fat when I look in a mirror do not apply. I have to admit, it can’t all be bad lighting, a bad angle or a messed up mirror. I am not tired, dehydrated or out of…
Two stories dominated the headlines this week, the aftermath mass shootings in Gilroy, El Paso and Dayton and the alleged suicide of sex offender Jeffry Epstein while awaiting trial. The “headline” making new news leaves little room for problematic reports like “Wealthy San Francisco Suburb Agrees to Desegregate School” or “Rape survivor fighting rapist for…
We’ve had two deadly mass shootings within 24 hours. Like it or not, this is who we are. As a nation, we vilified, killed and drove off the Native Americas, kidnapped and enslaved Africans, blocked immigrants from China with the exclusion act of 1882 and interned Americans of Japanese descent into concentration camps in 1942.…
To shoot yourself in the heart with a rifle is difficult. The average length of a man’s arm is 25 inches. from the base of the neck to the wrist. The distance from the butt of a rifle to the trigger is about 17 inches. You’d have to position the butt of the rifle over…
You are polluting just by getting dressed and you can’t go naked. Look at your clothes. You are most wearing some combination of natural and synthetic fibers. For the synthetic fibers, with every washing, those polyester, plastic like fibers break down go into waste water that makes it way to the ocean and ends up…
I am sad. There, I said it. And, I’m going to feel sad. No list of what I am thankful for. No attempt to do a “happy” activity. Our emotional control center does not work that way; different parts of the brain activate happiness, fear, sadness, disgust and anger. A good emotion does not negate…
Saturday, 6:45 am, my brother calls, “I know the earthquake was in southern California, but it was a 7.1.” I’m still a little groggy with no idea there was a second quake, “Nah, it’s all cool here, I have my earthquake go bag-I do need to put the $200 in cash back in it.”After a…
“Based on a true story.” That is code for a condensed version of the story, trimmed down to be told in a short period of time and carefully edited to create a compelling story of near mythical proportion. Coming this fourth of July, amidst the parades, barbecues and fireworks, are you celebrating a holiday “based…
Relationships, dating, marriage, my mind tries to reconcile rules and logic for what works and what doesn’t to make up for my limited and nonexistent experience. So, please understand both my confusion and fascination with the Conways. Yes, some people read trashy novels for the summer, I succumbed to a couple of hours of mindless…
Gun control – it’s not going to happen. Site facts and statistic, use current events and blame the NRA. Nothing is going to happen. Pontificate on a soap box, sign petitions, post on social media. You’re missing the larger context. Women. The Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) is a proposed amendment to the United States Constitution…
“Stop, stop, stop. I don’t care. You’ve not been taking a minute yet and I’m ready to check my phone for something more interesting.” That’s me abruptly interrupting a practice presentation. I’ve been coaching, technical people and the only way to shake them loose from a methodical droning of white noise is to stop them quickly…
“If you don’t know the problem, how do you know if you are fixing the right thing?” Stunned silence and followed by a sputtered rational, “Well, we don’t usually know the problem.” This scenario occurs with frightening regularity and variations on the theme. “I’m technical, I don’t get involved on the business side, but let…
Memorial Day – at times it seems we are trying to hard to forget what the day is really about. Which is rather ironic for a holiday that is all about memory. Memorial day is in honor of those who have died while serving in the country’s armed forces. Formerly known as decoration day, the…
My mom died of lung cancer. She never smoked a cigarette a day in her life. My dad was the smoker. My dad had a choice to smoke; my mom had a choice to live with a man who smoked. Cigarettes cause chronic illnesses and are deadly. But, you have a choice to smoke. Legislation…
Our devices tell us when to upgrade, when our performance is lagging and when we will no longer be supported. It’s not planned obsolesce to make money. There is a time when new technology can enhance performance (camera technology) and solve problems (thumbprint security). Basically, we know when things are ok, when to upgrade and…
“Sorry, there was a second gunshot, can you repeat that again? Yes, those are sirens, police cars are coming now, let’s see, there are 2,3, 8 of them. They’ve got the guy against a truck and 6 cops are standing in a semi circle around him.” That was my side of a conversation with a…
If you could take something to help wake you up, would you? Oh wait, there is coffee, tea, cola’s, a variety of drinks with caffeine. If you could take something to relax you, would you? Well, there are options, beer, wine, spirits; all natural distillations and more recently added to the list is cannabis. All…
“We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak. Epictetus” We have only one brain, so, in principle, should we believe and do what we are told rather than think for ourselves and draw conclusions? Many comments about the Mueller Report have a similar tone to…
I was confused by an email this week. I was copied, it was not directed at me, yet the content was so acrimonious and unnecessary, I felt bad. I was in awe of the eloquent response of my colleague. Societally, we accept a sort of ratio of bad behavior allowances for founders of companies, leaders,…
You’re on a plane. You hear “Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please. This is an emergency, and we are required to evacuate, please locate the closest emergency exit. Please exit immediately, but calmly.” Pause. What do you do? In an emergency, there is the stress response, and it is not logical. People start…
The historic, all women spacewalk didn’t happen. NASA didn’t have 2 spacesuits equipped to handle a woman’s smaller size. Blah, blah. blah. What a way to end women’s history month; a logical conclusion based on excuses rather than the admittance of gender bias. In lieu of a historic moment, we saw a historic trend. The…
It’s a strange thing that happens. When you travel, it’s a but harder to get everything packed back in; even if you don’t have additional stuff to add. But let’s face it, on most trips, you’re going to come back with more than you started with. You soon start to account for this and determine…
The math, it should balance out. Really it should work. Yet, history and experience show it doesn’t. You know this, you can have a day with 3 good things and you are so happy and yet something annoying that happened 2 weeks ago can null and void the euphoria. Why? Good news, good things trigger…
