Older: Aging is Like Milk; It’s Going to Go Bad

“You don’t get younger; aging is like milk, it’s going to go bad.” I laughed with a friend on Friday evening as I described a study that aging happens at accelerated bursts¹ two times; around 44 and 60. For me, it was like a switch got flipped when I was 62. We were a couple of months into the pandemic. Crepey skin and sagging! The difference was stark. The scale showed no difference in my weight. I can tell you, no amount of exfoliation helps crepey skin and those retinol, peptides, and/or alpha/beta hydroxy acids? You can slather formulated crepey skin lotion on thickly and cover yourself in plastic wrap and a before and after photo will show no change. After bargaining and a few other mindset shifts, I reached acceptance. Now, rather than fight, I warn, or at least I try to.

The best piece of advice I got about retirement is to understand who you are outside of work. I got a head start of 6 years and it served me well. Over 30 years ago, I read what women would tell their younger self, one thing that stood out, 10 years from now, you will laugh at what you didn’t like about your body; love your body now. I have repeated this many times over the years. It takes a few years and then people come back and really start to embody the thought. Hence, my mission is a bellwether for aging. Y’all, you don’t get younger; aging is like milk, it’s going to go bad.

That’s not a bad thing. It doesn’t mean give up; accept the phase you’re in. American culture has conflated looking good with looking young. Can you do what makes you look good and avoid the trap of trying to look young. We are inundated with ads for products an procedures that promise youthful, but, is the true objective to look and feel good?

Which takes us back to milk, it will go bad, it’s just a matter of how fast and in what form. By the time you notice the milk has soured or spoiled; it’s too late to reverse. You can just mask the change with added colors and flavors. OR, you can realize, it’s still milk, with a different use. Sour milk, you can use like buttermilk for a lot of recipes. Yogurt, cheese, all examples of milk that is not fresh. The milk is is still useful; it just won’t work for something like you coffee.

I accept I have a slightly different function at this age. I know some things, I’ve lived some things, I’ve grayed some hair and maybe, just maybe the ability to accept aging is the ability to find happiness.

¹ Scientists have found that human beings age at a molecular level in two accelerated bursts – first at the age of 44, and then again at 60. Scientists find humans age dramatically in two bursts – at 44, then 60